March 13, 2006
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Hmm…. I really got squat done for hw this weekend. Oh well. I had to print a ton of papers after school today. Like…15 or so. Bleh. Hm whoops I never read Hamlet… ah whatever. Hm Joey called me earlier. I didn’t answer the phone. How can that boy always be so cheerful when his life is such a complicated mess? Maybe he just doesn’t… think about it. Don’t know. Well anyway, this is awesome. Walked down to my dad’s house to get AP test money… of course my mom threw a fit. Got there.. he isn’t home. He’s coming home at 7:45ish. Got back home.. mom threw another fit. She acts like a child. Literally.. a tantrum. She actually threatened to “call Brandon” and make a scene if I go back there. lol… I don’t know why she sticks her nose in my business so much. I mean here she is now.. in my room… not leaving. God she’s pathetic.
But I shouldn’t take my anger out on her I suppose. Afterall, she isn’t the one who has been lying to me for weeks. My friends have been extremely supportive. :-T Especially Jacky and Logy. And Mandi even. I’m trying my best to make her feel better, too. :T You know… Logy should be the one to be upset that I didn’t listen to him in the first place. Bleh. I feel guilty. Well, okay.. I’ll NEVER not believe him again. Eh? lol… It’s just.. when it’s something this important, when you love someone… and believe it when he says he loves you too… then you don’t want to believe that he’s lying to you. Who knows, he could still be going out with Sarah. I don’t really care anymore. He lied to Mandi and he lied to me. I’m so sick of being his little secret. I’m so damn sick of it. Ever since we started talking and getting close again these past months, I’ve been a secret. And said it was his “only option” or whatever. Right. Always chooses to lie. Saying it’s only physical with me to Mandi to reassure her… telling me he loves me and that we’re “meant to be” to keep me in the picture… and lying to Sarah about all of it? NONE of us deserve that. How can he…. such an asshole…
pianoroark: I just… want things to be perfect when you get to IU, shelbi
pianoroark: everything I do now… is based around that
pianoroark: bleh
QuaziBizzle: you could meet someone before then anyway
pianoroark: … not seriously, shelbi. not to replace you
pianoroark: you don’t need to worry about that
Session Close (pianoroark): Sun Mar 12 01:41:00 2006
Yeah fucking right.
Ahem, anyway, I’ll allow my mom one day to see if she can find out if she can get any federal aid for the ap tests… because i had no luck. So I’ll have to go back to my dad’s house tomorrow. Thing is, I left a message for him saying I’d be back tonight. Oh well. Anyway, I have… so much hw. It’s ridiculous. I don’t even know where to begin. SO I’m going to go now. bye bye
“For some wounds, you have to rip off the band-aid, let them breathe, and give them time to heal.” – Grey’s Anatomy
